Episode 10: Feel - BLaST Intermediate Unit 17

Transcript

Welcome to BLaST the Airwaves with BLaST Intermediate Unit 17. Here at BLaST Intermediate Unit 17, we strive to transform lives and communities through educational services. On this podcast, we will provide you with educational solutions for all, no matter the learning environment. So teachers, administrators, caregivers, what are you waiting for?
What would happen if we started questioning, what if? What if we had a positive perspective on education? What if we flip the switch on education? What if we were the solution?
Hello listeners. We are excited to BLaST the Airwaves with you today and provide educational solutions for all. My name is Rebecca Gibboney, and I am the Curriculum and Online Learning Specialist here at BLaST Intermediate Unit 17. I am thrilled to welcome you to episode ten of BLaST the Airwaves.
During this episode, we are actually going to take a step back and feel. We are going to take the time to feel what you have been going through the past couple of weeks and try to understand why we are feeling the way we are feeling. It is not easy, especially now, amidst all the chaos to take the time to think about your feelings; but, why not take the time right now, today, on your drive to work, your drive home or perhaps during your walk around the block? So, let’s start blasting the airwaves.
Let me ask you a question. Do you believe, I mean deeply believe, that you, as an educator, can change the trajectory of a child’s life?
You do. Even during these tough times, you do.
One of the hardest parts for me, when I was in the classroom, was knowing my impact. And even now. It was not like something I could immediately see. It made it hard for me to actually feel I was making a difference. And, that’s the funny thing. As an educator, the relationships you form are deeper than the surface; they are years from now. You may not know your difference today or tomorrow. You may not know it or see it a year from now. Who knows, maybe you will know it 10 years from now. Maybe you will never know. I have found that the key is, the key is to believe it. We believe that we are making a difference.
Sometimes it is easier said than done. No doubt. John Hattie has determined these mindframes of Visible Learning, and when I have those tough days, when I feel like there is not hope, I reach in my drawer and reiterate these mindframes to myself. Some of them include:
It is believing that I am a change agent and that all students can improve. For me, now, it is believing that I am a change agent and that all teachers can improve.
It is collaborating with other teachers, other colleagues.
It is seeing assessments as my impact and planning my next steps.
It is striving for the challenge and not merely “doing my best.”
Man, doing my best. That is hard right now. More than that, I just feel like sometimes my best is not really good enough. In fact, I have been having that inner battle of ‘I can do better’, ‘I can do better’, and I know I’m not alone. I know educators are out there struggling with this same battle.
It’s exhausting. I’m exhausted. But, I don’t get exhausted (or so I thought). How can we show up for our students, our colleagues, when we cannot even show up for ourselves? How can we build these authentic positive relationships that are so crucial to our students and colleagues?
But, you can. You are okay. We are okay. We are doing our best. There, I said it. And, you are probably thinking ‘yea, right, Becky. You are having one of those moments again where you think anything is possible.’ And, maybe I am.
But, guys, it is. It is all possible. Thanks to Brené Brown’s most recent Unlocked podcast and the article on ‘Surge Capacity’, I have started to feel like my “new best” is okay. What I’m feeling right now is okay, almost normal, and I am not alone. You are not alone.
All of these emotions, this exhaustion, it’s all because we have run out of our “surge capacity”.
Our what?
Let me take a step back. Ann Masten, a psychologist and professor at the University of Minnesota, defines surge capacity as the collection of adaptive systems (both mental and physical) that we, humans, use for short-term survival when we are faced with stressful situations.
Folks, this is what we have been running on for the past three months, six months. But, guess what? Our surge capacity tank is starting to run on empty. Things that we used to go to to cope in the short-term, they are running out. So, now what?
I’m done adjusting to the “new normal” (I am also done sort of with the phrase new normal, might I add). But, “how do [we] adjust to an ever-changing situation where the ‘new normal’ is indefinite uncertainty?”
How do we adjust?
For those of you who do not know me, I am a very solution-oriented person. When faced with adversity, I find a solution. It is not a bad thing; but during these times, when there is not really a quick solution, I have found myself stumped and almost feeling helpless.
As educators, it is our job to help. It is our job to fix. It is our job to show up. Yet, we have felt so much loss. From face-to-face instruction to modified openings to our unique smiles. We have all experienced loss. For me, loss looks like any synchronous face-to-face trainings, my weekend mornings in coffee shops. Traveling– my biggest lost. Just the loss of not getting up and going to visit my family because I have to be aware of who I have been around and if I am putting my family at risk. All of those this.
So, as I sit here with my Dunkin coffee at my house and take all this in, I wonder how will I ever get through this? My surge capacity is on empty. What else do I have left? How can I, we, function? How can we surge past the loss and the exhaustion?
Remember, we cannot create any positive relationships, if we first do not have a positive relationship with ourselves.
There is no expert in this field. Like I’ve said before, no one has experienced this exact thing. However, I do believe that there is hope. There are people that have perhaps experienced an inkling of this. There is advice, wisdom, out there. We just have to be patient and listen.
Masten, Boss and Maddaus, all professors at the University of Minnesota, offer some words of wisdom for us through these times:
For starters, accept that life is different right now. It does not mean that by accepting we are giving up. No! We are educators, we do not give up. It simply means, stop fighting it. Conserve that energy and stop wishing and wanting the old times. It is simply not going to happen, yet.
Next, are you ready for this one? This one is so hard for me to say or even type, and my fingers are dancing over the keyboard right now as I hesitate to write it. Expect less from yourself. There, I typed it, wrote it, said it. It is not that I do not agree with them. Believe me, I complete agree. It is just that I have a hard time not expecting more from myself, especially during these times. It’s just who I am. I expect the best from myself. Masten says it best, “We have to expectr less of ourselves and have to replenish more.” While I still struggle with that concept, I can agree with this. I do not know about you, but this pandemic has really forced me into some self-discovery. For me, it is my silver lining. Self-discovery. Just spending the time to discover me. Who I was, who I am and who I want to become. What are you discovering about yourself during these times?
Third, recognize grief. I never really thought about the pandemic as grief until I read this article and I also listened to Rachel Hollis’s most recent podcast – “You Can’t Heal What You Don’t Feel”. But, guys, we just talked about what we have lost as a result of this pandemic. We have to feel it, the grief. Give yourself, give ourselves, permission. Perhaps you have felt the different stages of grief during this pandemic? The denial that this isn’t really happening. The anger. The bargaining. The depression. It’s real! But we have to allow ourselves to feel so that we can fully accept what is happening.
They go on to encourage focusing on building those important relationships, practicing the “both-and” thinking, and continuing to add to your resiliency “bank”. And, you might be wondering, Becky, why are you bringing this up in this podcast? This podcast is about solutions for all. This episode is about building positive relationships.
Great question.
It’s just I’ve been thinking a lot lately and talking a lot lately with educators across the state and we’re all feeling the same way. It goes back to those mindframes. Where we always felt that we were and could be great educators. We can make that difference. But, now, we struggle to even feel like teachers. How do we make an impact? I want you to know that you are doing your best and you are not alone. When I heard Brené Brown’s podcast, the idea of surge capacity, and Rachel Hollis’s podcast on grief, I felt a lot of weight push off my shoulders. I felt as if I had permission to feel. An answer I know I’ve been feeling lately. I realized my best was the best for now and I had to be okay with that.
And, I realized that I would never reach great, I would never pour from my own cup, if I did not first realize what was going on inside me.
Educator friends, during these times of craziness. You are great; but, believe you are great! Because, as we talk about building these positive relationships with students and your colleagues, we cannot build these relationships without first building one with yourself.
You are a change agent, especially during these times.
You continue to seek out the challenge and live in the challenge.
You are making that impact.
Give yourself some grace. Take what it is as what it is. Take some time to learn more about you as an educator and an incredible human being.
Because like Michael Maddaus says, “There are two ways the brain deals with the world: the future and the things we need to go after and the here and now, seeing things and touching things. Rather than being at the mercy of what’s going on, we can use the elements of our natural reward system. We can use what’s going on around us to construct things to do are good no matter what.”
Friends, do good, no matter what.
We would like to thank you for blasting the airwaves with us today. If you like the show, please subscribe or leave a review. If you want to know more, check out www.iu17.org for further resources and show notes. As always, we want to thank you for what you do every single day. Remember, keep shining. We’ll be back next episode to provide you another educational solution for all, as we continue to transform lives and communities through educational services.